Posts Tagged ‘spirituality’

Trusting your feelings

 

I am going to speak to you all about something very personal which happened to me. I was going to keep it to myself as I tend to be the type who likes to lick her wounds alone, but this is something I know must be shared. So as difficult as it is for me to say this, I feel I must share it.

I was molested by a “Healer”. This man approached me at one of my fave spots to unwind. When he approached me I immediately felt like he was no good. But I put it aside because I wanted to believe he could help me. I have been going through some of the most difficult times of my life. I am going through major growing pains so to speak. I know that these changes are for the best, but when he came to me….I was at one of my lowest points. I felt exposed, vulnerable, and profoundly helpless. The previous evening I had prayed (begged really) for some help. When this man came to me I originally thought he was not a good person, but then I thought, “You asked for help. Here is your help.” So I accepted his invitation. He told me that he doesn’t charge for his services, that he believes that if he charged for it, he would loose his power. So he knocked down my financial wall. I agreed to meet him at a public spot so he could read my palm and give me healing. So I met with him. I was very nervous about meeting him tho. I sent a pic of his business card to a friend just in case. (all signs that I should’ve listened to) I met with him and and he read my palm. He told me some profound things. He also told me some things that I didn’t agree with. But such is true with most healers and psychics that we meet. You must only trust what feels right or resonates with you. He said a few things that made me squirm, but when he spoke to me it felt like a teacher speaking to a student. Nothing too bad. So he then said he wanted to meet me to do his healing work. We decided to do it on my birthday. Sounded like a wonderful way to spend my special day ….. I was wrong.

The day of the “healing” I was nervous again. I was profoundly worried that something was going to go wrong. I should’ve listened to that, tho as my friend pointed out, it was my birthday and nothing bad is supposed to happen on your birthday! I will not go into detail as to what happened in that room, but it was the most uncomfortable I have ever been in my whole life! I had to make him stop many times over and should’ve made him stop for good but I wanted to believe that it wasn’t what I thought it was. He tried to touch things that should not be touched by a healer, EVER. As a healer myself, I should’ve known to totally stop him then, but I didn’t. He didn’t do anything that would’ve constituted rape, but if I hadn’t controlled him, I believe he would’ve. He has been calling me since the day and is getting meaner with each message he leaves. I will be going to the police as I don’t want this to happen to anyone else. Esp someone who would assume all of this was acceptable.

Having now been through this, I now feel it is necessary for me to talk about it so other Women and Men know that if they are by any means uncomfortable with a Healer’s work, they have the right to stop them! Perverts are many things, but the one thing they rarely are are discriminators, they come in every profession, every type of personality, every spiritual belief. Do not ever think that just because the person is more knowledgeable about a healing modality than you, or comes from a country that is famous for healing, that they can do something to you that makes you uncomfortable. If there is something that causes you discomfort, they should find another way to do it, and be happy to do so! This man actually told me that he heals men different than how he heals women. He said he works on Men’s heads only. He doesn’t take the “venom” out of their bodies, like he does women. I asked him “Well, then can’t you heal me like you heal Men?” He laughed and said “Don’t be silly my dear! You are a Woman!”

If anything positive can come from this horrid experience, my wish is that my words can help prevent it from happening to someone else. Please, everyone always listen to those gut instincts and NEVER once let someone do something physically to you that makes you uncomfortable, esp if they are doing it under the guise of a Healer. Healing work should be beautiful, profound, and cause you to feel a million times better after you walk away from the session.

And if this has ever happened to you, know you are not alone! Know that you are not a bad person and YOU DID NOT MAKE THIS HAPPEN! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! Don’t be ashamed! Move forward, one step at a time and let it be a lesson for you. I have learned more about myself in that brief encounter than I could’ve in hours of meditation. Trust me, I’d prefer the meditation, but I can’t turn back the hands of time. So I embrace the lessons given to me and I hold onto faith in myself and my guides. I know that life is still profoundly beautiful and that I am a much stronger person because of all of this! Hold your heads high and listen to those gut feelings everyone! And NEVER -EVER- let someone steal your light!

Shine on! ,

Alysia